Monday, October 29, 2007

Soooo....this means I don't have to study, right?

No testing. As my doctor has explained it, at this point there is no need to do any testing until after the 3rd consecutive miscarriage. Reason being? Statistically the next time should be fine. Also because he says there is no reason to waste the time, effort and money and not to mention give us false hope that it'll all be figured out. Here's the deal as he explained it: Even with all the testing, the majority of the time there is no cause to be found for multiple miscarriages. And if there is a cause to be found....most of those there is no "cure" for. Basically you would be aware that you would have whatever specific condition and be aware that this could cause a miscarriage.
As the plan stands now....wait 3 months before starting to try again. However, I did bring up that it took a year & a half to get pregnant this last time. I've now got to set up an appointment in a couple months to discuss our options to address that. I have to get my blood drawn once a week until my hormone levels return to normal. Once I get myself all put back together we'll talk about I suppose drugs to take to get me knocked up.
Also on a lovely side note, thursday at work I flushed what there was of the baby. I went out & got myself severly drunk that night. I had a lovely time. Caught up with an old friend who was back (stationed in Germany, been in Iraq for the last year), met a couple new friends & could barely function with my hangover friday at work. However, I work with some very understanding people!

Thursday, October 18, 2007

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

No baby. Monday evening I had some light spotting/bleeding. Tuesday I called the dr & went and had some blood drawn. My hcg level was 387. In 48 hours it should have at least doubled to 774. It went down to 358. So now I await the onslaught of blood, gore and cramps. I'm so excited.
I was actually holding onto a tiny bit of hope. I only had light bleeding off & on and absolutely no cramping or anything else. This. Fucking. Blows. Now I get to go to the dr next week to chat about these wonderful things. There's a chance we'll have to have some genetic testing done to see if there is something wrong, or if we just have really really sucky luck. We'll discuss & go from there. It took 1 1/2 years to get pregnant again. I really don't want to have to wait that long again. I know other people have waited longer & for some it never happens. I've been known for my bad luck. I hope this is just another one of those times.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Same Song, Second Verse: "The Big C"

I just recently found out, as did my aunt, that she has cancer. My aunt T (not to be confused with my uncle T who has cancer) is only 42 years old. They are as yet unable to find the direct source of the cancer, but it has metsastisized to her brain and paratid gland. They've decided to start treatment (as opposed to just waiting around doing nothing) while they continue to try and find where it originated.
I have not seen my aunt for 15 years. I want to go visit her now. She lives in Washington. I just keep thinking I'll have to take a long weekend, bite the bullet & buy a plane ticket and go. I just feel like if I'm going I should take Faith because that side of my family has never seen her. Then it's kind of like, well, why doesn't Matt go to? Because we can't fricken afford for all of us to go! That's why we didn't go this summer like we had wanted. We were hoping to go next summer but now I don't think that will work out.

Monday, October 01, 2007

The Rabbit Died

Hey all, I'm knocked up! Yay! Just found out yesterday & haven't really told anyone yet (except the hubby of course). I'm excited & scared. I'm kind of afraid to get my hopes up seeing how things went last time. Best guess at a due date for right now is around June 10th. That's all I've got for now!