Too Young

My dear aunt T, who found out she had inflamatory breast cancer in September of 2007, has died. She passed around 2:30 this morning at her parents house. She just turned 45 last month. Way too young.
It was just in 2007, not too long before she found out about the cancer, that we had really gotten back in touch again. It was actually the first time I'd had any contact info for her on my own, as an adult. I'm so glad that we were able to make it out to visit her this last March. It means a lot to me to have had that time.
I'm waiting to hear from my dad & grandparents as to funeral plans. I may be making a quick trip to WA. I guess she will be cremated and they might possibly have a small service soon, I think more for closure for her parents, but are planning a larger "life celebration" in the spring. I'll definately be going out for that.
She will be dearly missed.

She's An Original

Last night we had Faith's first parent teacher conference of her kindergarten career. It was, pretty much, a glowing reivew. Her teacher said that she is responsible, helpful, dependible and a good listener (among other things).
The teacher did bring up that Faith tells her she is tired, often. Which I figured would come up! A month or so ago Faith told me one morning that her teacher told her to ask me if she could go to bed earlier. I thought, Great!! She probably thinks my kid is staying up late on school nights 'till like ten (and getting drunk on the weekends). So Faith's bedtime had been 8:30 at the latest so that was changed to 8 and some nights even 7:30. But I figured it would come up! So we discussed the changes and she said since Faith was letting us know she was tired she figured there had been a change, she just wanted to mention it.
Something else that her teacher said was that as a teacher you see the same types of kids every year, you can pick out which ones they are, but she has never before had a "Faith". I belevie that is a good thing, a compliment. She was smiling when she said it anyway!
We are quite proud of our little girl. I am so glad that she is enjoying school and that so far, learning is coming easy for her. I hope that lasts.

Dude. You need to blog!

Yes, Erin. Yes I do.
So, what I have I been up to you wonder? Well, lets see.... Fall seems to have arrived yesterday. Probably only temporarily. But I'm really enjoying the nice cool weather we're supposed to have for the next couple days. I made some yummy chicken noodle soup yesterday.
The new job is going well. It's a bit of an adjustment becuase for the last several years, I have been the one with all the answers, or at least know just where do go to find them. At this job, I don't know anything! Well, other than common sense and the eclectic knowledge of life I've gained in my various jobs I've held over the years. Which is helpful at times. But there is a lot of learning. I feel like I'm picking up on it pretty quickly and so far no complaints from farther up. So I guess, so far, so good!
The biggest thing right now is the birthday party we're planning for this weekend. Or not so much the party this weekend at the actual birthday on Thursday. My baby boy will be one year old! My, the last year has gone so fast. When I think about it, it doesn't seem like it's been a whole year since he joined our family. But at the same time, it seems as though Dominic's always been a part of the family. He is such a sweet little boy too. He's always got a smile & a wave for everyone. And he's my shameless little flirt. I'll have to put up a new pic or two soon!

Fresh Start

I start my new job tomorrow. I must go find my social security card and do a load of laundry!

The end of the old job went ok. I found out our new office manager does not do much work (which I kind of thought) and makes $5/hr more than I was. Which I didn't know. Also, as I suspected, she is a bitch and has been telling the boss half truths, whole lies and pretty much talking out of her ass. I told the old boss (who still has a large financial stake in the company) that if he ever found himself in charge again to give me a call. He said he will and I'll get a raise. Of course, we were drinking....

Decision Made

Well, I have done it. I have quit my job. I gave my two week notice so my last day will be the 28th. I had typed my resignation & took it to work with me but still with no decision made. I told myself I would make a decision before lunch. I weighed the pros and cons all morning long. I finally decided that, in the long run, leaving my current job and taking this new one is what is best for me (and my family). When my office manager (and I use the term loosely) returned from lunch (late, as usual) she found my resignation on her desk. And, the other girl in our office was in her office within 2 minutes. They shut the door and were in there for a good 20 minutes. As soon as she went in there and shut that door, I knew I had made the right decision. They have a lot of "closed door" meetings. For no apparent reason. This is one of the many reasons, that I will not go into, that I decided to leave. Some of the main reasons are the high drama content, not being able to trust what anyone says and the massive weekly changes in my job descripton, duties and what I am "allowed" or "authorized" to do.
I am done. I am on to better things.

Dilema

So, here's the deal. I'm having issues at work. About 3 weeks ago I was ready to walk out of my job and never go back (had I had another job to go to). There seems to be an irritating pattern of my boss & the new office manager getting a stick up their asses and suddenly deciding they have a problem with me. I'm so sick of the drama. Then, within a week, everything is back to normal.
After this most recent hissy fit by them I actually applied for a job. (Because honest to god, I just don't know if they're going to be randomly pissed off one day & fire me.) I had an interview on Friday & was offered the job today. The main thing holding me back from accepting the job tomorrow & giving my two week notice is...the pay. It's $3/hr less than what I'm making. Yes, we could be fine. Basically, the difference is what we pay for 1 of the kids every 2 weeks for daycare. Faith will be starting school mid August so it would essentialy be breaking even. I was so looking forward to Faith starting school & actually being able to SAVE that money we had been paying. I don't like living paycheck to paycheck. We NEED to be able to save money. We actually have been doing pretty good...except for those unexpected big expenses we've had recently.
I just don't know what to do. Do I leave my (slightly) higher paying job for a job with less drama, more stability & more potential job growth down the road? Or do I stay where I am with the higher stress, being treated like crap every couple weeks and not much job security with a little more pay?
I'm leaning towards leaving because I do have my family to consider. I'm not conceited enough to think I am irreplaceable at any job, so it's not like either is guarnteed job security. But it seems as though the new job might be a better enviorment & be better in the long run. I'm just worried that it might be a "grass is greener" situation. I just don't know. I have to decide soon.
Help.

D.O.N.E.

So. Totally. Done.
More later, I just can't form the sentences right now. I'm irritated & would just ramble. I know you're all just waiting on pins & needles! (all 3 or 4 of you?) :) See, not so bad that I can't still be a smart ass.

L.O.L. Baby!

no, not laugh out loud....Locks of Love!!

Several months ago, fairly out of the blue, Faith announced that she wanted her hair cut. Short. I told her that was fine but we had to wait until after her dance recital (so I could put it up). Since she wanted it so short I asked her if she thought it would be a good idea to make sure her hair was long enough and she could donate it to locks of love for some other little girl that didn't have hair. She thought that was a fantastic idea. (10 inches is the minimum length to donate)

The dance recital was Memorial weekend and she's been asking about her haircut since. I keep asking her different questions to try to make sure she's ready. She is. So, the cut starts!

And here we are, with the 10 1/2 inches in a ponytail no longer on her head!!
And this is the final result. This is only her 3rd haircut in her (almost) 5 years of life. It's such a change! Faith loves it. As of tonight she is thrilled, I just hope she's not sad & missing it tomorrow! I have the Faith-less ponytail in a plastic bag, I just have to get a padded envelope (per the instructions) to mail it in and we will ship it off. I'm so proud of my baby!

The Band Wagon

Well, I guess everyone is hopping on the Tiller band wagon, I might was well too. I thought about leaving a comment over at Julie's but the more I thought about it the more I had to say & didn't want to dump it on her!
Do you realize he is referred to as Tiller the Baby Killer? Let me just say this up front. I in no way think that it is right that this man was shot and killed. However, I also don't think it's right how all of the sudden the media is "morning the loss" of this "great man".
I guess my exact views on abortion would be described by some as wishy-washy. Either you're pro-life or you're pro-choice. Here is how I feel. You may disagree with me, fine. This is my opinion: If you find yourself pregnant and do not want to be you have the choice of abortion. I have not found myself in that situation but I can imagine what it would be like. You need to asses your situation & have your abortion ASAP if you choose to do so. If you're hemming & hawing about this & wait until you're 7+ months pregnant; I'm sorry but screw you. Have the baby & give it up for adoption. Now, I'm not saying there should not be exceptions such as the life of the mother is in danger or significant birth defects of the baby. There is always an exception to the rule. Those are things that need to be decided by a medical professional and the pregnant woman.
What this man did (and the few others like him that perform late term abortions) was kill viable babies. These babies were all but delivered alive before he shoved a sharp instrument in their skull to kill them. Seriously. If that baby slipped out a little more, it would be born alive & by law he could then do nothing to the baby or he would be charged with murder. So, a few inches is all the difference between an abortion and a murder. Just a technicality.
I do feel for this man's family. He was murdered. I guess that's pretty cut & dry. A few inches this way or that, he was still shot & died. No technicality for him.

Garage Sales Rock!

This was my newest garage sale purchase:

It's about 2 years old, used twice and I got it for a 3rd of what she paid for it. Woo hoo!

Dominic obviously diggs it too.

Blurb Book

So, this photo was taken last summer at a local festival. It was August & sooo hot! The fresh squeezed lemonade really hit the spot!

I am submitting this photo into the http://www.iheartfaces.com/ Blurb Book photo contest. I am granting I ♥ Faces permission to use my photo in a printed version of a book for commercial use and possibly advertising of a photo book on both the Blurb and I ♥ Faces web sites.

My Girl

This was my little girl in August when she went off to her first day of preschool. When she started school she could write her first name, but now she can write her last name too. She has learned to tie her shoes and many other things. Her teacher sent home a note saying how much she enjoyed having Faith in her class. She also said how she was a very good friend. She would help her friends anytime they needed and is very proud of her acomplishments.

Below is my sweet little girl this morning. A mere 9 months after going out the door for her first day of preschool, this is her heading out the door for her last day. Next time, it's going to be her 1st day of kindergarten. Yikes!!

Holy crap, look at where her head is compared to the door knob in the 1st picture & then the 2nd! Man did she grow.

Work Update

Well folks, so far, I'm still employed. Apparently whatever problem they had in their heads has passed. Or, maybe they're just having me train the new girl for my job and planning my demise for a later, more convienant date. Oh well. I'm not going to worry about it. I'll just show up & do my job.

Bracing Myself

So, come next thursday, I might not have a job.
I was "offically" written up last thursday. I have until the 30th to um, I guess show significant improvement. See, since January I guess my performance has declined. I'm guessing it's because I've been doing the work of, roughly, 3 people. But I guess one of the three of me is not doing my job good enough. Shit. Bad Sharona.
Also, our new office manager (?) boss (?) chick that was hired in Jan. is interviewing new people. Yes, we're trying to grow. I'm told she's not trying to replace me. Now, do I beleive the B.S. they're shoveling? Not quite.
I guess my thought is this. If you're not happy with my performance, fine. If you're giving me a warning, fine. If this warning was just paperwork for the file & you've already decided I'm gone on the 30th then you're an asshole.
We'll see.

BLECH

Okay, so I've said before how I have very realistic dreams. I had one last night. The only part I remember was I was with these people against my will. I don't know why, or who they were but we were there. One of them was mixing up a huge jug of stuff they were going to make me drink. It was a weird blue color and the only thing I know of that was in it was at least one small container of elmer's glue. The consistancey was a little runnier than glue. (this is just weird, I know.) Now at this point, they were going to make me drink it one way or another. I asked if I could have a straw. I figured it HAD to go down, maybe with a straw I would taste it less. (I feel really stupid even typing this!! It's just weird!) Okay, so I drank the stuff. It was disgusting & made me want to vomit but they forced me to drink it. I woke up after that so I don't know what it was supposed to do but all day I had this horrible, nasty taste in my mouth.
Once again, I've shown you all just how weird I am. Fantastic.

The Trip

Our trip to WA was wonderful. I'm really very glad we were finally able to make it out & visit. There were several times as we were all sitting around the living room hanging out & talking that I just kind of stopped & looked around & was just kind of like, "wow. I'm really finally here again." But for the most part, it was more like we always come visit & it hadn't been 16 1/2 years.

It was also very fortunate that during our visit my aunt T was doing well. She was able to spend time with us & play with the kids. I know she would get tired & go rest but we were able to spend quality time with her. I think she made a lasting impression on Faith! Aunt T gave her kool aid for breakfast and pretty much at any other time too! Faith really enjoyed aunt T's dogs. Penny is a little deaf dog that would hang out by Faith on the floor & get some loving. Then there was Milo, whom aunt T was afraid might um...eat the children. However, Milo was a perfect gentelman! It took him just a little bit to warm up & then he would hang out for awhile then go in the other room for some quiet time. When we were flying out of Seattle Faith seemed a little sad. I asked her what was wrong & she said she missed Penny & Milo!

I was a little concerned about the akwardness factor with my dad & stepmom. I would say things were great.

My dad & Dominic

I was not really sure how to address the "this is my dad & stepmom and uh, your grandpa" with Faith. I put it off until the last minute because I really just didn't know what to say. After they had pulled up at my grandparents & were on their way in Faith & I were standing in the kitchen. I said "hey Faith. So, that guy (we saw them out the window) is my dad. Sooo, that makes him your grandpa." Faith kind of gave me a suprised funny look & says "so, you have two dads?! Awesome!" and moved on with life. There you have it. Nice & simple!

My Aunt T, Aunt C, stepmom & dad

The Countdown

Well, plans are all taken care of. Tomorrow before we go to bed, everything is to be packed in our bags. Then, Wednesday morning it will all go into the car and we will leave right after work. I'm still really nervous about this big of a trip but not near as much as I was!
However, I am a little worried about the road conditions of the pass. It was closed less than a week ago because of the snow! I suppose if it is closed, we can crash at my cousin's house in Tacoma!
Speaking of which, my aunt who lives in Oregon just happens to be going to Seattle/Tacoma on the 19th to spend the weekend with her daughter & grandkids. So we're going to meet for lunch after our flight gets in! I'm so excited! She's like my other grandma. When we were little my mom's parents lived in KS so I really didn't know them, but my aunt J kind of took that place for us. Although I have other aunts & uncles that live in OR whom I love, aunt J is the bestest. Ever.

You Kick Ass!

So, I always knew that it takes a special kind of person the be in the military, but I never realized how special of a person it takes to make a military wife. Woman, I do not know how you do it!!!
In the last two weeks...Faith puked. The husband had a fever, chills, puked. Dominic has been teething, wheezing, coughing etc. Faith then puked again. Then, I was sick. The kids are still battling pretty nasy coughs. My kids/family do not get sick often. We're very very lucky. There were two adults and two kids. I am exhausted from the lack of sleep. I just don't know how you manage alone with multiple sick children often. You're my hero! : )

Set in Stone

The non-refundable tickets have been purchased and rental car reserved. In just over a month we will be flying in to Seattle. As I thought more about this trip I decided that I wanted to make sure that I had good pictures. And, as much as I HATE to have my picture taken, I needed to make sure I was in those pictures. I did a google search and found a photographer to come take family pictures. They will be semi-casual photos taken outside at my grandparents house. I've emailed my grandparents & dad & stepmom and told them they better put their smiles on and that I don't want to hear any whining, we're doing this! As much as I would love to see that side of the family more often, the reality is that this will not become an annual trip. I honestly don't know when we would go back again so I want to make sure that Faith and Dominic have really nice pictures with their great grandparents.
So, now I'm mentally packing all the time. Should we take the stroller? We'll take the front carrier & sling. If we have the stroller that just one more thing to lug around. I've ordered a bag for the car seats. I'm hoping Dom's car seat & Faith's booster seat will both fit in the one bag. Faith will have her backpack with some toys, a small blanket & what not to carry on. We'll take one carry on suitcase with a change of clothes for everyone & other important things. I ordered a backpack with a laptop compartment so I can hopefully use the rest of the space as a diaper bag and purse to cut down on how full our hands are changing planes. The plan is to check one big suitcase (but I worry about the weight limit) but we might have to do 2. Plus checking the bag with the car seats. The upside is, according to the airlines website, they do not charge the baggage fee for carseats. So we'll have 2 adults, 2 small children, 2 backpacks, 2 suitcases & 1 large bag full of carseats. I worry about getting from our car to check in. Once we check the large suitcase & carseats we'll be fine. I hope.

Booking a Flight

I'm currently online checking prices for flights to WA. We actually got some money back on taxes this year (thanks to the little boy) and we have decided we are going to visit my family. I'm super excited but kind of nervous. It's been 16 years since I have seen or spoken to most of them. They are, essentialy, strangers. I did not realize how nervous I was until I was trying to book our flights. It is making me physically sick. I feel nauses. I am on the verge of tears and my stomach hurts. I think it's also a little bit that I'm scared to take my kids on this big of a trip. And I have to be the responsible adult. I'm scared.

POTUS

I'm not a hugely political person. I'm not a hard & fast republican or democrat. I've never really paid much attention to politics. I think partly because of my parents/family. It wasn't really discussed when I was growing up so it was never normal conversation.

Now I'm at the point where my ignorance is my own fault. During this last election I did follow things more & realize I do lean more towards the republican side.

I know everyone's vote counts, but my thought on this election was that there are certain votes that should NOT count. Those that voted for Obama for the sole reason that he is black and those that voted against him for the same reason. Then I think it would have been a little more fair. It may have turned out with the same result, I just don't think skin color is a good reason to vote for or against a person.

That being said, we're getting a new president today. No, I don't agree with him on some things. Yes, he seems a little shady. I just hope he does a good job.

So many people have such high expectations of him. Even if he was a guy that I agreed with on everything & thought would be the perfect man for the job I still don't know that he'd live up to the standards that people are expecting. I know it's a big deal that he's the first black president. But ya know what...get over it. He's a man with a country to run. He has a huge job & he doesn't need to worry about all the little black kids & families that think this is somehow going to change the world. I'm not saying it won't have some effect but come on. You have people saying that now, we ARE all equal. Ya know what, if our society thought that we were all equal, it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference of the color of our president's skin and people would not be making such a huge deal out of it. Also, have you noticed that on TV most of the people they stop to interview about how they feel about this day are black? Like people of other races don't have an opinon? Every TV station wants to get that story of the elderly black man who never thought he'd live to see this happen. Or the little black kid who knows now one day, he can be president too. Who ever told that little kid he couldn't in the first place? It's all just cliched & getting old.

I don't want to come across as racist so I hope nothing above seems that way. I think it's great that we've elected our first not white president, but to me, the color of his skin does not matter. It's what he does as a president for our country that matters.

At 3 1/2 months old...

We have a tooth! It's the bottom left one.

What have you done?

The colored ones represent what I have done. Feel free to play along if you wish.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band - high school, I played the clarinet & bass clarinet. No one said it had to be a "cool" band!
4. Visited Hawaii - was sooo close this summer, but was too pregnant to go : (
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang/played a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea - nope, just the ones on the prarie
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating - a fish!
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Made a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

After reviewing this list, it looks like I need to travel a little!

Baby Weight...and the regular kind too

I have weight issues. Always have. The thinest I ever was is when I graduated from high school & started college. I did not gain the fresheman 15. I lost weight. Of course, it's not because I was eating healthy & exercising! I was on a mostly liquid diet. Alcohol liquid. I'd stay up late partying & drinking, get up hung over & not hungry. Go to class or work, depending on the day. Proabably eat a late lunch/early supper then start up the partying again! Now, I realize this was not healthy, but boy was it fun! Anyway, not a diet I care to really go back to at this point in my life.
So, my final weight when Dominic was born was, I beleive, 245. About 10 of which was gained in the last month. My weight when I became pregnant hovered around 228-232. Around the time Dominic was 5 weeks old, I weighed 213. Then, I started gaining weight back. After the holidays of eating, the most I weighed was 234. I then rejoined the gym & went on a diet. On the 1st "official" day of my diet I weighed 230.5lbs. That was December 30th. As of today I have lost 5.5lbs. Crap. I have been practically starving myself and going to the gym for ONLY 5.5 lbs. I know for 12 days that's probably good but it's still frustrating. I think the reason it frustrates me most is because of the flabby baby belly. I'm going to have to do some massive sit-ups & what not if I want to make a differnce in that area. Spending time on the treadmill & lifting weights, etc. aren't going to fix that problem.
Anyway. I hate weight. I hate being fat. I hate having a flabby belly that, by the way, is still numb. Nothing like nerve damage from a flippin c-section. I hope I can stick to my new diet. I'm basically trying to pay attention to the calories I consume. That's something I've never really paid attention to. I actually ran across this place, which I think is helping me a lot.

*By the way, I NEVER tell people my weight. Scary stuff. Don't tell anyone!